heart of gold
sometimes i intensely fear myself.i find myself in a situation- quite often- where i am pushing people.
i don't mean to- but it can't be that everyone feels pushed and that i am not doing anything to create that kind of a situation. it has to be something i am doing.
i try so hard to be unselfish. too hard, maybe. i think sometimes i want so badly to be a better, more loving, more unselfish person than i am.
i don't think i am as good a person as i would like to be- or need to be.
that scares me.
that's how i'm known. without being a "good person" what the fuck am i?
who the fuck am i?
am i even capable of feeling real love? i think i am. i feel it in my bones- but it could just be illusory- like my heart of gold.
so if i don't really know who i am- how could anyone really love me or have real feelings about me without knowing who i am?
this is going to be an introspective week.
posted by D @ 9:01 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home